Thursday, January 24, 2013

Ideas for J.J. Abrams' Star Wars

Earlier today, it was announced that J.J. Abrams would be directing the new Star Wars movie, due out in 2015. Of course, this film would be listed as Episode VII in the Star Wars saga, but there's been a great deal of speculation as to what the movie would actually be about. The numbering of the episode suggests that it would take place after Return of the Jedi. The only thing that George Lucas has said for sure is that the upcoming trilogy will not be based on any existing books or comics, but will be an original story. With what we know thus far, I've taken some time to think about a few possible directions that the space opera could go.

Pitch 1 - During the celebration on Endor, after the destruction of the second Death Star, Han Solo writes a touching, if mysterious note in Princess Leia's yearbook. Based on his written words, Leia gives up her dreams and her future plans and decides to follow her crush all the way across the galaxy to attend the same space flight academy. Leia, of course, has no interest in learning to fly spacecraft, but she convinces herself it's worth it because she thinks she's in love. No? How about...

Pitch 2 - During the celebration on Endor, after the destruction of the second Death Star, Leia is approached by a mysterious man in an Alliance uniform. She's informed that she has been chosen as a recruit for a special division of Alliance Intelligence (AI). Despite the death of the Emperor and the destruction of the most powerful weapon in the galaxy, there are still remnants of the empire out there that need to be eliminated. Leia accepts their offer and immediately begins her training on Coruscant. When she becomes engaged to long-time love, Han Solo, she decides to come clean and tells him of her secret agent double life. Upon learning of the fact that she spilled the beans to Han, her superiors order his assassination. It's only then that she realizes she has been working as an agent for the remnants of the empire, not against them. She is then recruited by the true AI and tasked with taking down Empire Intelligence from the inside. The story then gets kind of convoluted with the involvement of obscure ancient Jedi and Sith artifacts that seem to have no real connection to the story at large. Yeah, I'm not sure about that one...

Pitch 3 - After the celebration on Endor, all of our major characters hope on board the Millennium Falcon and decide to take a well deserved vacation. Unfortunately, they crash land on an uncharted planet that they initially believe to be uninhabited. The Falcon is beyond repair, so our fearless crew can only hope for rescue but make the best of their situation in the meantime. Han makes speeches about living together or dying alone while Luke goes on and on about it being the will of the Force that they crashed on that planet, and that they were all there for a reason. It isn't long before they discover that they really aren't alone and that there's more to this planet than meets the eye. Stay with me, I've got another one...

Pitch 4 - What we didn't know at the end of Jedi is that when the second Death Star was destroyed, it created a singularity in space. The singularity grew and eventually engulfed the entire forest moon of Endor. The moon (and everyone on it at the time) emerged on the other side in an alternate universe. Our classic heroes did not become aware of this until they flew the Millennium Falcon away from Endor and realized that none of the stars looked familiar. It is then that they encounter the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise, members of the United Federation of Planets. Skywalker and the gang mistake them for a part of the imperial fleet (in spite of the vast design differences). This misunderstanding leads to action and hilarious hijinks and finally merges two of the most popular science fiction franchises of all time.

All right, all right... It's not likely that J.J. will ever even see any of these ideas, much less use them. But if one of these turns out to be the Episode VII that we see in theaters in two years, remember where you saw the plot first. And I will expect a pretty big royalties check.

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