Monday, January 02, 2012

The Single Guy and the Milkshake

The End of Year/Beginning of Year Weekend was pretty low key for the Single Guy. It probably didn't help that he had been dealing with a pretty bad case of bronchitis. The coughing and hacking kept him from having a very merry Christmas. His medications caused him to enjoy the warmth of his bed well before the stroke of midnight on New Year's Eve. But New Year's Day brought him a healthier outlook.

He had started feeling better a couple days before 2012 officially began, but Saturday morning was the first time he had woken up with the ability to fully take a deep breath in weeks. The Single Guy figured that was a good sign. But he still wanted to take it easy.

But New Year's Day gave him a chance to hang out with Subway and his family. They broke bread at Panera and then decided to head over to Macado's for milkshakes. Honestly, the milkshakes weren't that great. Well, they were milkshakes, so they're a little hard to mess up, but the Single Guy had had better in the past.

Once the shakes had been ordered, Subway and the Mrs. both pointed out that the waitress was flirting with him. The Single Guy isn't great at picking up on these things. Sure, he realized there was some giggling at the things he said and there had been a significant amount of eye contact happening, but did that constitute as flirting? The Single Guy wasn't so sure.

And even if the waitress was actively flirting, would the Single Guy really be interested?

The evening progressed. Conversations carried on. Over time it was determined that the waitress was a student at Lynchburg College, making her roughly ten years younger than the Single Guy... red flag. Her cute giggling became full-on laughter, and her laugh turned out to be loud and obnoxious... red flag. Oh, and she might have been a little racist... red flag.

Needless the say, by the end of the night, the Single Guy felt no compulsion to ask for this girl's number. He walked away from Macado's feeling good about his decision to pursue absolutely nothing. The way he saw it, there had to be older waitresses out there who weren't racist and had much nicer laughs.


  1. They're out there. My wife is neither a waitress or racist.

  2. Ha ha. I'm pretty sure there is an older non-racist waitress who has a perfectly normal laugh out there. Hope you find her!!