Saturday, June 18, 2011

Legends of the Bank Teller - Episode CII

And here we arrive at my final Legend of the Bank Teller taking place in Raleigh, North Carolina. Future legends will be coming to you from Botetourt County in the Commonwealth of Virginia. But let's end things in Raleigh with a bang, shall we?

My last week in Cameron Village was a fairly typical week at the bank. I enjoyed my final Wednesday off (since I'll be getting 40 hours a week in the new position). I got to see Spider-Girl one last time on Thursday. And then Friday was a typically busy Friday.

But Friday was a little different. Because it was my last Friday. It was my last day. Period. And it was incredibly bittersweet.

I saw a lot of people come through my drive-thru. Some were genuinely happy for me in wishing me well on my promotion and my move to Virginia. Some said the obligatory "good luck" just to be polite, but you can tell with some people that they just don't mean it. But, to be fair, with a lot of those people, I don't mean it when I tell them to have a good day either. We all go through our lives playing our parts insincerely from time to time.

But the work day itself wasn't anything special. It was the after party that was slightly off the charts.

Barney Stinson had us all over to the clubhouse in his building. It was a pretty decent set-up with a pool table, a couple TVs, and Jell-O shots. The apartment didn't provide those. Barney did. And he was kind enough to include lime, my favorite flavor of Jell-O.

A little side note, I've never done shots of any kind, Jell-O or otherwise. I also hadn't had a sip of any kind of alcoholic beverage since New Year's Eve three years ago. Then, it was just a glass of champagne. I've never in my life had enough alcohol to make me drunk. But I was willing to give the shots a shot. Why not? I was among friends and Barney had offered to let me crash on his couch. So what did I have to lose? Aside from possible liver function.

We got to the clubhouse at the apartment around 6:30. A few minutes later, I was offered my first small cup of lime flavored lighter fluid. Without fear, I tossed it back. And wow, that was some strong stuff. Now, Barney's the one that made them and he, himself, said that they were strong. Now this is the kind of guy who takes his drinks with more than average alcohol. So for him to say they were strong, they must have had a lot of vodka.

Shot one didn't phase me. And then we ate. Pizza provided at no charge from a client that banks with us. That was pretty awesome. I had three slices, so that helped to absorb what was to come.

We played pool. We told stories. We laughed. A lot. And in total I threw back eight of the lime Jell-O shots.

Obviously, I survived, so let's not panic about the amount of alcohol I consumed. As I said, I've never been drunk before. And as far as I could tell, or anyone else could tell for that matter, I still have never been drunk.

Eight of these shots and I felt nothing. I assumed, going into this thing, that I would be a lightweight and would behave unpredictably after my first three shots. Then I hit five. And I began to wonder if I was doing it wrong. Barney told me he was impressed. He was more impressed once I topped it off at eight. By 10:30 I had finished my last one, but still felt no different. I was a little tired, but I chalk that up to the fact that I only received three hours of sleep the previous night.

So thanks to this going away party and my willingness to finally participate in some drunken shenanigans, I discovered that I have a genuine super power. I am impervious to the effects of alcohol.

Now, there's a good chance that my mother and even my grandmother will be reading this. Don't worry family members, I'm not going to start turning to alcohol as a form of recreation. At least not on a regular basis like some folks do. No, I figure it wouldn't do me any good anyway.

It is a little disappointing to know that if I'm ever involved in a bad break-up, I won't be able to go out and drown my sorrows.

As for the rest of the party, I had a great time with everyone. I'd post pictures, but I forgot my camera. And Barney's girlfriend hasn't uploaded her pics to Facebook yet, so I can't steal those either. But, even without photographic evidence, I can guarantee that a good time was had.

Thanks to my manager and all my co-workers for two memorable years at Cameron Village. I may not have always enjoyed my time there (as seen in many of my blog posts), but that was no reflection of the people I worked with. I genuinely mean it when I say that I'll miss seeing them on a regular basis. Luckily I'll be working for the same bank, so staying in touch shouldn't be a problem.

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